You ever been just messing around while you're home alone and you do something totally awesome? You have two major thoughts at that moment - 1) Holy Shit! I did it, and there's no one around to see! and 2)Well, I'll never be able to replicate that again. Well, thanks to the miracle of the internet, I can at least tell the whole world (read: the three people who read this blog) about it:

I fucking twirled, dude.

Alright, that sounds a little "eh" to some so here's what I'm talking about: Alli's at the gym, and I'm getting dinner ready. For those who don't know, I LOVE to cook. I'm making calzones, so I need to prepare pizza dough. Long story short - those guy who throw the dough in the air and make it twirl around in order to stretch it out? Yeah, I did that. I did that home alone with no one but the cat around, and her useless ass was sleeping, so she didn't even see the awesomeness of Chef Matt throwing his dough... Is it lame to be this excited about this kind of thing? Ah, who cares, I still fucking rule for it.

posted by MAtt D. at 6:28 PM

 
So, most of the time, I have a basic, irrational (by which I mean the forces of logic and reason are not applied, not stupid) reaction to everything I encounter. I of course, have a little dialogue in my head that filters these reactions, forces me to examine the reasons behind them, and change my viewpoint to a much more toned-down and sensible one. Well, I decided to remove the filter and let some of these reactions loose. Some might seem stupid or offensive, but that's why I filter. That's why everyone filters. So...Pointless Guttural Reactions to the World
without self-examination

You are not Bettie Page. You are not Bam Margera. You are not a vampire. You are not a character in an anime. I need to spend less time on myspace.

I heard SDSU called "still drunk, still undeclared" the other day. I thought it was really funny because I don't really know anyone who went there that's graduated in under 5 years and it was our basketball rival at USD, so I feel inclined to dislike it, though I never really followed our basketball team...

I feel like I have the unalienable right to drive 85+ on the freeway and if you don't get out of my way, I have the unalienable right to tailgate you.

I don't believe in popular "manly" stereotypes like following sporta or talking about cars, but I do believe in ones that are equally as arbitrary such as if you don't like dark, hoppy beer you aren't a real man, or if you prefer sweet mixed drinks to whiskey...

Chicks who smoke look like skanks to me. For some reason, I see a young woman puffing away and automatically think, "bet she'd rather be puffing away at some dick." On the same note, I naturally assume the same thing about girls who dye the underlayer of their hair jet-black and the outer layer platinum blonde.

I still hate kids who "try to be weird." Just because you dyed yourself 7 different colors does not make you an interesting person.

Wow. It's like primal scream therapy or something.

posted by MAtt D. at 9:32 PM

 
How in the hell did I get engaged? I spent the morning catching up on dorky webcomics that I used to read in college. No joke. I would spend like, hours reading webcomics in college. I spent a lot of hours on dorky dorky things. I am completely amazed that an actual woman found me suitable for lifelong partnership sometimes.

In other wedding news... we just made the painful discovery that Comic-Con is the same weekend as the wedding. FUCK! If you're going to need a hotel room I'd start booking it NOW, because the rest of the rooms in San Diego are going to be occupied by man-virgins dressed as Wolverine having lightsaber fights and arguing whether or not Kevin Smith is better as a screenwriter or comic scribe. And because we'll be partying it up late into the night possibly even after the reception, I'll expect that everyone will need a hotel room.

What's that dear? Oh... apparently Alli and I (read: Alli) are supposed to decide on one hotel to put all the guests so they can be all together. Well, hopefully we'll find one that's not full up with unshaven Xbox addicts with large stashes of InuYasha porn. I'll keep you posted.

posted by MAtt D. at 12:17 PM

 
This Is Just To Say

I have rediscovered
Williams' poetry
in an old
college textbook

and which
many of you
could
care less

Forgive me
its just so
simply phrased
and so genius.

posted by MAtt D. at 8:02 PM

 
I had a post all typed up and then lost it. Bummer. In other news, I once again fit into size 32 pants, something that hasn't happened since junior year of high school. My diet and exercise program kicks your program's ass.
posted by MAtt D. at 3:47 PM