lately, my life has been pretty... "exciting" and "interesting" and other words people use when they mean to say "shitty." Lately, Alli's been dealing with a stalker. Some person, whose identity remains a mystery to us all, began with leaving her flowers picked from the neighborhood on her doorstep. This itself is not such a sin and could potentially be construed as sweet, but when the creepy notes started coming, we decided it was time to take it seriously. What was creepy about these notes? Well the first one was the weather section of the local newspaper indicating that whoever this is couldn't be around to drop off flowers on days it rains with the sloppy scrawl at the top "butt in mind: 4 U ok?" A few (rainy) days go by, and eventually we get another note, this one a full page, front and back. Lots of misspellings, but the handwriting was much better. This note made it clear that this person watches her, has an ideal of her in his mind (what she's like), that they are very attracted to her, and that they masturbate to the thought of her. Which, as we all know is the universal way to attract the ladies' attention. Women who read this page, wouldn't getting a note that a dude likes to "cumm" (sic) around and watch you without your knowledge so they can beat it later just warm the cockles of your heart? So I've been staying over there every night this week since thursday, and waking up super early to try to catch him in the act.

I don't know how many of you know this, but I recently got rid of my own stalker student - a creepy girl who had some sort of relationship built up in her mind that didn't exist. She got transferred to a school for emotionally disturbed kids. And then this. To put it in my brother's words, "How the fuck are you two such a hot ticket that you both have been stalked?" What can I say, Alli and I are HOTT with two fucking Ts. But why can't we attract more normal and attractive people? Fucking stalkers.